Week 5 Preview:

Warthog's Wackjobs (20-16-0) vs. webz Wombatz (24-11-0)

Webz has been cruising through the Advanced League, mostly with favorable matchups and sheer luck as opposed to Fantasy skill. This week Warthog shows him what a true regular season champ does to temporary #1s - crush them. This should actually be a good match, as both Double-Ws are strong and weak in 6 of the same 9 categories. Warthog wins 7-2.

Motown Prides (18-17-1) vs. Winless Hustlers (22-14-0)

Can Winless separate himself from the pack, or will it be a Motown throwdown? Both squads had very close games last week that could have gone either way. Look for Winless to cool down a little and Motown to pull out a 5-4 victory riding the coattails of Garnett and Marko...wait what? You just added Marko Jaric to your team? I didn't know he still played in the NBA...okay switch that to Winless winning 8-1 then.

M*A*S*H*E*D (15-21-0) vs. Rancho Drebabys (19-15-2)

Ouch. Not the best time for Tater to meet up with the ultra-hot Dre, who completely dominated Warthog last week despite only winning 6-3. His team knows how to score, assist, rebound, steal, block, even Jefferson is draining 3s...and they have decent percentages as well. Don't worry Tater, at least with Maggette, Stuckey, and Darko injured, you'll take Turnovers and avoid the embarrassment of a 9-0 thrashing.

MC Jammer Pants (15-21-0) vs. Mr.VanSmack (14-21-1)

This could get ugly. In fact, it probably will. Neither team can shoot or score, but Jammer can shoot bunnies and 3s while max can steal and block with the best of them with few turnovers. Since max should have guaranteed wins in 3 categories and Jammer in 2, I'll take max with the 5-4 victory this week.

Three-peat #1 (20-16-0) vs. Sour Notes (16-19-1)

Low goes to jail for strangling Flip Saunders and forgets to set his lineups for the week. Three-peat wins 8-1.

Loanshark (20-16-0) vs. The Pink Slips (12-24-0)

Where is Slippy anyway? His smack says 'we need all the help we can get' and he's right. Loanshark is having a fine season with Yao, Aldridge, and Turkoglu playing well, while having other guys fill in nicely. Slippy's team is better than his record though, but lacking consistency and a true star besides Gasol who is having a down year. Loanshark's success this week will depend on the health of china doll Gerald Wallace, which is like depending on Low to say something nice about Flip.

16 Mile (17-19-0) vs. Rapid Ralphies (18-18-0)
Himat's Team (17-19-0) vs. The Pastor's Year (18-18-0)

All 4 teams have played equally mediocre this year and I want to go home now, so here's an equally mediocre prediction: 4-4-1. The end.